I’m not saying the world ended today. But something irreversible happened. Something sinister. Something coded in false eyelashes, kawaii giggles, and state-sponsored TikTok charm. Fishtank Season 4 premiered, and what should’ve been a new cycle of mentally ill freaks punching drywall for money has become something much darker:
The waifupocalypse.
Within the first few hours of the stream, two new contestants emerged: Angelina and Ellie, the twin harbingers of this season’s downfall. Two Asian females who have somehow already established a cult following among chat, despite both exuding the exact energy of girls who would talk over you in Discord and then log off to Netflix and chill with their CCP supported boyfriend.
Let’s not sugarcoat this: on the Hotness Index, both Angelina and Ellie register as solid 5s, maybe a 6 if you’re squinting from across the room with COVID-19 and deep-seated maternal abandonment issues. But none of that matters, because they’re Asian. That’s all it takes. The chat has already formed a parasocial suicide pact over these girls. It’s tragic. It’s hilarious. It’s a war crime.
I watched a dude in chat named “gleeber” type out, “I would donate my kidneys to Angelina if she farted on my face.”
Bro. She wears prescription lenses and still doesn’t see you.
Let me be clear: these aren’t e-girls. These are Psy-op girls. The CCP read the weak minds of Western men like an open-source GitHub repo. They know exactly what flavor of mental illness turns a Twitch viewer into a simp-slave. Ellie says two sentences and the chat collapses like the Roman Empire. Angelina breathes through her nose and suddenly Redditors are creating AI-generated wedding invitations.
This is statecraft.
This is biological warfare via side bangs and mediocre eyeliner.
And it’s working.
Meanwhile, the sleeper agent among them, a man named Jin, has infiltrated the tank like a whisper. A softboy shinobi, wearing his quietness like a cloak of invisibility. The chat’s gay community has already declared him their supreme leader. But most disturbingly of all? Burt, a known womanizer, an alleged alpha, the man once dubbed “Black Daddy,” is now blushing like a schoolgirl every time Jin appears on camera.
Burt used to be a warlord. Now he giggles when Jin says “pass the soy sauce.” It’s humiliating.
I don’t even think Jin is trying, I think it’s instinct. He’s trained. You don’t gain that kind of effortless dominance without undergoing some kind of sleeper cell indoctrination.
He’s not just playing the tank. He’s controlling the tank.
And none of you see it. You’re too busy writing fanfiction about Ellie choking you with her thighs.
She wouldn’t. She literally wouldn’t. She’d call you “icky” and block you in real life.
Let’s break it down:
- Angelina: Cute in a quiet girl who ruins your credit kind of way. Couldn’t find Mongolia on a map, but apparently she “radiates goddess energy.”
- Ellie: The girl who says “omg stopppp” when you make a joke. Chat already convinced she’s secretly a genius because she blinked twice and drank water.
- Jin: Mao Zedong’s revenge incarnate. Emotionless. Beautiful. Probably AI. Making straight men question everything while simultaneously turning chat into a gay cult.
I fear this is the final form of Fishtank.
No longer a human experiment — but an algorithmic psyop.
A CCP-funded emotional blackmail generator.
Angelina and Ellie are camouflaged drones sent to harvest simp energy. Jin is the handler.
And all of you fell for it. Like clockwork.
I used to think this show was about unfiltered reality, about watching human beings descend into depravity. Now? Now it’s about who can act the most kawaii while installing mental malware into the viewer base.
If you’ve ever typed “my waifu” into chat today, you are already compromised.
Throw your router in the ocean. Move to the woods. It’s over for you.
TL;DR:
The Asians have won the tank.
The simps are brainwashed.
The gay fans are enthralled.
I am the last free man.
— cracka_jack (Redpilled and Ramenless)
If I disappear, Jin did it.
Jin is a Thai boy